Is there anything on there that you’ve already done? Anything you want to join me in doing? Tell me about it!

As I start to dive deeper into my journey in Chicago and jump-starting my career, I get brought back down to earth (since I’m on cloud nine a lot of the time) by a handful of quotes.

“Maybe the past is an anchor holding us back. Maybe, you have to let go of who you are to become who you will be.” - Carrie (Sex and the City)

Now, one might not think that quoting SATC is relevant (or at all eloquent when I’ve quoted much better sources), but this week, it totally is. I went home to Florida to see my parents this weekend for the first time since I moved to Chicago. It was also graduation weekend. There were a lot of memories from the past six years since I started college, and particularly memories from high school.

I’ve relocated three times in six years. From Overland Park, Kansas, to Orlando, to Tampa, and now I’ve landed in Chicago. I’ve certainly let go of a lot of my past to get to where I want to be. But there is one part that I just can’t shake.

For the past seven years, I’ve been having these dreamy, heads-in-the-clouds conversations with my high school sweetheart. He is without a doubt my best friend, and I always call him when things with my new relationships are on the rocks. He does the same. We catch up for a couple weeks, talk about our grand backup plan to marry each other if by (insert age here) we haven’t found anyone that compares, and it’s all roses and butterflies. For seven years I’ve been playing this game. I know how it ends, we go about our lives and catch up again in 4-6 months. I know the ending. Did I mention we’ve been doing this for SEVEN YEARS?

For now a quarter of my life, I’ve been tossing around the idea and hopes that we’ll someday be reunited and the fire we had in high school will still be there. Now I’m sitting here, in Chicago, with a great career ahead of me, and I can’t help but wonder, at what point in time do I stop playing, and let go? Do I? I can’t. It’s not like this is some damaging process that we go through – if anything it gives me something extra to smile about for the week or two that we entertain the thought of getting back together. At the end of the day, I’m in Chicago, he’s in KC, and neither one of us is fond of long-distance.

I just feel like someday, this is going to work out. But at what point in time do I tell him to get his shit together and commit already or I just drop it? Being the hopeless romantics that we are, we keep playing this game. This quote troubles me, but answers all of my questions at the same time:

“Fate exists but it can only take you so far, because once you’re there, it’s up to you to make it happen.” -Can’t Hardly Wait

Now, with this career in mind, the game has changed. I’m hoping to be brought on board full time at some fabulous agency here in Chicago. I’m working super-hard at my internship, trying to contribute as much as possible to add value to the projects that I touch. He’s secure in his career, and was fortunate to land a fantastic engineering job right out of college in a time when engineers aren’t finding a lot of work.

So it’s probably not going to happen anytime soon.

I guess the game has come at the perfect time, as my up-in-the-clouds hopes of romance will definitely keep me from getting distracted with anyone who lives here. And right now, a local distraction could kill me. A local distraction, in times past, has been the reason I stay up late on the phone when I should be studying, and my priorities get all screwy.

So I’ll keep truckin’. I’ll keep working hard, making friends, trying to prove my value at my internship and let the chips fall where they may. I’m excited. And for this week, you know why I’m extra smiley.

Okay, so here it is. My “I’m-so-excited-and-this-is-why” post. The post of all posts. The post that is supposed to brag about everything I’ve achieved through the diligent use of mentors, social media, and my education. Except, the story has changed. And I already did a lot of bragging here, and here.

Yes, I’m still excited to move to Chicago. Yes, I’m thrilled that connections I made in Austin at SXSW are what got my foot in the door with one of the largest global PR firms. But the new and shiny has wore off the initial news.

Now reality sets in. I need to save $____ to _____ my stuff and put it in my _____ in _______. So many blanks to fill in, I feel like one giant mad-lib. Insert amount of money to be saved here. Insert move or store my stuff there. I’m moving to this neighborhood and it will cost this much. It’s numbing my mind.

I search almost obsessively for apartments in Chicago. I ponder daily whether I should just move all of my stuff and go for it, sign a year lease and take that leap, or if I should keep it down here until I know what’s going on with me after this internship program.

I want to move my stuff up there. I think it’s symbolic of me doing this, pursuing my career without looking back. I want to move my stuff up there because I want to believe that I’m good enough to get hired full-time somewhere up there. I want to believe that everything I’m doing is enough to have these people beating down my door to have me come work with them.

I’m planning for all angles here, so let me know if I miss anything.

Perfect Scenario:
I move to Chicago with all of my furniture and find a fabulous apartment in a great neighborhood and I magically sell my car that I’m upside down in. I work like a madman, taking in as much as humanly possible, learning everything from everyone, and after the eight weeks that are required before you’re eligible for a full-time position, one is created by the PR Gods above and I’m working with people that are brilliant in a department that utilizes my talents. I make enough money to keep the apartment I picked out, and I don’t have to use my credit cards that I just paid off. I know that I’ll be in this position for awhile, so I go ahead and take all of the necessary steps to become a citizen of the state of Illinois. Oh, and my blood isn’t too thin from living in Florida sunshine for four years.

Almost Perfect Scenario:
I move to Chicago like mentioned above, but maybe my perfect apartment isn’t available anymore, so I find something almost as fabulous (no biggie). I still work like crazy, but maybe the PR Gods want me to experience the whole 16-weeks of intern-dom and theeeen there’s a position open for me to pursue. I do, and I get that dream position and I start my career with a bang. It’s a little chilly, but I’ll get a jacket and be fine. (My dad would tell me to suck it up.)

Probable Scenario:
I move to Chicago with everything I can fit in my car, but leave my stuff at home for the time being. I have a colleague who said I can store my stuff at her house, so I do that, at least until I know what is going on with my life after the program. Sixteen weeks fly by, and I’m gaining a ton of knowledge and offering some of my insights as well. After the 16 weeks, I’m offered a full-time position which I graciously accept. I ship my stuff up to myself, figure out what will fit in my apartment and go from there. Watch out windy city – I’m ready!

Borderline Nightmare (but okay in the end) Scenario:
I get an apartment that’s alright. I can live with alright. The internship goes well, but due to the “economic stress” (which I think is total, complete BS by the way), there are no positions available at this firm. Another agency has another intern program I can go through while I figure it out. Or maybe the internship goes as well as it does in the other scenarios but maybe the weather really kills me.

Nightmare situation:
My mediocre apartment is great for a week, until I realize there is a serious ____ infestation. And I can’t get a hold of my landlord. And the hot water goes out. And I still can’t get a hold of the landlord. So now I’m infested and freezing in the shower. The internship is awesome, but I learn that I hate agency PR, the whole reason I moved to Chicago. There aren’t any jobs – like, I can’t even wait tables while I wait for an opportunity in PR. Then I get evicted, not because I can’t pay, but because my building is being rezoned into a playground. Or a jail. And then a meteor strikes the Lake and there is a great flood and it doesn’t matter because I’m drowning.

::wake up::

I know I’ll be fine. I do. I always figure it out. Always. But what if this time is the time that I can’t handle it? What if this is the time that pulls me under and I can’t get out?

I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that the semester is winding down and now I have half of the things to worry about that I did during the semester. Perhaps now I have more time to over-analyze.

If this doesn’t work out, it’s not the end of the world right? I mean, I’m not a failure if I go up there and it doesn’t work out. I can come home, apply for jobs down here and make a living for myself here in Florida.

I have an outstanding network of people that I could contact if Chicago doesn’t happen. I just really want to believe that this is the direction I’m supposed to go.

So, do I go for it, and if it doesn’t work out, come back to plan B? Or do I play it safe, keep a backup plan in clear sight and hope that I don’t have to use it? I don’t want it to seem so cut and dry, but in my mind it is.

Have you ever moved for your career, but not known what would happen after ____ days?  Have you moved for an internship and prayed for the best or did you play it safe?

I never planned to have a job lined up for after graduation.  I mean, don’t get me wrong, I was hoping, but I didn’t plan for it. And I plan everything.

My initial thought was to cram as much into this semester as humanly possible. But the timing was off. So I settled with the fact that I’d have to come back after spring semester and take two classes this summer before I was officially graduated. I decided, based on that knowledge, that I didn’t want to walk with my class this spring and then have to come back for two more classes. (It felt like I was lying.. lol) If I was going to walk, I wanted to walk and not have to turn back. No more college. I walk and that’s it.

Now I want to walk with my class. I want to walk on Saturday and I can’t, because I didn’t plan on the chance that I’d have a job lined up before I graduated. So now, do I walk in August or do I just get up and go to Chicago and call it a day?

I can sell myself either way.

I should walk because: this is all about me, not my class, I don’t have to walk with my class. I have worked really hard to get this degree. My parents should see me walk. It’s a really big deal. I walked for HS graduation, why wouldn’t I walk for college?

I shouldn’t walk because: I move to Chicago in August, I’ll have to fly back to walk on August 8th, or, I have to put off moving and then there’s less time for me to acclimated. I am not walking with my class, so why does it matter? Nobody walks in the summer. I want to move on with my life. You have to pay to walk, and I’m tired of giving USF money.

I’m leaning more towards yes. I do want to walk. My parent’s didn’t, but they weren’t traditional students either. I need to walk. It closes my chapter in Tampa. It solidifies that I’m a grown-up.

Did you walk for your college graduation? Why or why not? Is it a big deal? Will I regret not walking if I decide not to?

My blogging hiatus of nearly a week is without a doubt well-earned and not a bad thing. I needed a break.

I am uprooting my life on August 1st and high-tailing my Florida tan to Chicago for a bigger and better opportunity. I asked my employer how long I have to wait until I blog about this, and I’m still waiting for the green light to scream their name from the roof tops, but as I sit at this intersection, waiting for the light to change, I need to do a little dance or something. I’m going to go stir-crazy.

 I’m holding off on the “I am so excited and this is why” post and will publish that when I get the go-ahead.

In light of my success, I have run into a mix of emotions and responses from friends and colleagues in my current arrangements.

“You’ll be back. Chicago is too cold.” This may or may not be true (the too cold part). But I’m certainly not going to quit my dream because of some wind and north-pole temperatures. And keep in mind, I’ve done winters for 20 years, and just recently moved to Florida. Unfortunately, at this time, there aren’t any opportunities to advance my career here in Tampa, so I’m not going to sit around and bartend while I wait. Opportunity is knocking, so I’m moving to where it is. I’m good like that. And why wouldn’t I? I’m single, I’m graduating, and I have nothing keeping me here (but I will miss my fam).

“Chicago is too expensive.” Maybe it is. Maybe I’ll be eating Ramen for a year before I get my feet firmly on the ground. It’s a risk I’m willing to take because I’m going to be doing something that I’m passionate about. And passion takes the cake over easy any day of the week. Here is an interesting bit about being passionate about what you do.

The people in my field (and people like me) are stoked for me. The PR department head is freaking out. My hair stylist (also relocating across the country) who is one of my closest friends is so proud and excited.Everyone in my graduating class is proud, and saying “I knew you’d get it”. These are my fans and my friends and people I’ll be working with in the future – so good thing they’re friendly about it.

“You got lucky,” (read: the people with no drive are pissed) Lucky? No. Prepared, working extremely hard and following up on opportunities? Absolutely. I have colleagues at the restaurant that are two or three years out of college and doing nothing. Not because they are looking and there is nothing available. They aren’t looking and they’re fine with it, until someone who is successful comes along. Then they take their lack of drive out on me and try to throw all of their negative energy my way. And then when I don’t bite, they play the pity card. Sorry kids, your lack of motivation is not going to bring me down off this cloud. But thank you for trying.

The ones who thought I couldn’t do it don’t talk to me anymore. Good riddance. I said I was going to that conference to learn as much as possible, meet some amazing people and hopefully come home with great contacts and some opportunities for my future. And I did. So, “I told you so”.

What have I learned from all of this so far? You never know who your true friends are until you tell them that you’re leaving in four months. Who is excited for you? Who cuts ties? Who will actually visit like they say?

Well speaking from experience, nobody will visit. The people that are excited for me are the people that really know me, not the people that think they know me. The people cutting ties are the people who are unsatisfied with their own lives and don’t want to be a part of my success – or the people who are afraid of being hurt. I’ve done it too, someone is leaving, so it’s easier for me to not be involved than to deal with the emotions of losing that person. Maybe that’s what is happening. Though I doubt it.

Okay so this series has now extended into the realm of Twitter’s number one trending topic on Monday nights: #journchat. Founded by @PRSarahEvans, #journchat is a mix of journalists, PR pros, students, bloggers and whoever else wants to participate.

My question was featured in tonight’s session: “Question #6: What is 1 tip for college seniors about to graduate into PR/Journalism?”

Here are some responses:

Here is a few more tips from some people in my network. Do you have a tip? Feel free to share!

Some common themes:

1. Networking is vital. There is no denying this. I think every single person I interviewed for this series, published or not, put networking at the top of the list. So get out there and get started!
2. Be open to learning and new experiences. We don’t know everything. If we did, we woudn’t be in an entry-level position. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a point of view on everything. If there’s one thing I learned from these interviews, “I don’t know” isn’t an answer. You need to have an answer for everything. Whether or not it’s right or wrong doesn’t matter – having a point of view is what is going to help you learn.
3. Ask questions. Lots of them. This entire series was based on a question. Asking questions will get you answers.
4. Find a mentor. I have another mentor thanks to this process. Aaron Strout even wrote about mentoring me. Get a mentor. People who agree to mentor you are obviously where they are because they have or had a mentor that helped them succeed and they are eager to give back. Find someone to take you under their wing. Ask them questions, be open to learning, all of these common themes come full circle with a mentor.

Do you have any tips that you got before graduation? How did you find a mentor? How much value do you place on networking?

I’ve been fortunate enough to connect with some pretty influential PR people in the first 24 hours I’ve been in Austin for SXSW, and feel like I learned more about myself last night in 3 hours than I have in the 23 years I’ve been on this planet. I’m always interested to know more about what people think about me, or how people perceive me, and last night I got a good dose of someone else’s reality.

I had a very informal interview last night and for the first time, I feel like I didn’t nail it. After every interview I’ve ever been in, I always feel like a rock-star, and last night (this morning) was a real shock to my entire being. As I boarded Continental flight 1437 en route to Austin, I was totally confident in my skills, what I have accomplished and where I want to go. I had the support from the PR department head, other professors, students that admire how driven I am, and I was ready to take on anything that came my way.

Lesson #1: I need to get more comfortable talking about what I want to do, in front of more than one person. Last night was so intense. It’s 2 am at a diner in Austin and I’m being interviewed by one of the most influential people in PR. Across the table from me is a big-wig, owner of a boutique agency, past-president of three major agencies. Next to him is my roommate, who came along for a bite to eat. She’s never heard me talk about myself like this, and how often is your best friend in the interview with you? Sitting next to me is another big-wig, a social media god (though he prefers “deity”). It was a totally different environment in which to be interviewed, so I’ll chalk it up to a good experience, and definitely something to learn from.

I couldn’t stop sweating. I stuttered like someone with a legitimate speech impediment. I avoided eye contact. I was not me. I was some nervous wreck. I’ve never been so uncomfortable in my life, so unsure of what was coming out of my mouth. Who was that at the table last night? The girl in my place was someone who was all of the sudden in the presence of people that matter, people that have seen tens of thousands of people like me. I shut down, I forgot everything I wanted to say, I couldn’t remember anything that sounded halfway intelligent.

Lesson #2: I don’t deserve shit, and I’m intellectually behind.

After talking to Mentor #2, I feel like I have a ton to work on. He asked me if I thought I deserve more, and I said I did. “You don’t deserve shit, Sydney”, he said. And he’s right. I need to work. I need to succumb to the passion and just let it rip, and then things will come. I don’t think I meant it like I want everything handed to me on a silver platter, but the message is the same, regardless of what I meant.

When I told him I feel like I’m behind, he said “you are, intellectually.”

Lesson #3: PR is about making people understand why they matter – not social media. Social media is a tactic through which you can disperse the story, but the story is the key, and the story comes from believing in the client, and understanding why they matter.

When he asked me why we’re here (as PR professionals), the correct answer was not everything I’ve been taught in school. The correct answer was not “to represent X and maintain their image” or “a communication function of management” or any other definition that I’ve swallowed and regurgitated for every test in the PR sequence.

The correct answer was, “to make people understand why they matter”. His approach on PR is something I’ve never seen. It’s everything I never knew I wanted to be. Sure, I have ideas of what I want to do (though they aren’t very concrete, after saying them out loud) but talking to Mentor #2 really put things in perspective.

The guy is a genius. Maybe a little crazy, as most creatives are, but brilliant nonetheless. He asked me what kind of releases I was writing for Moffitt. I told him about this doc who has been here for less than a month and has performed two first-ever surgeries at Moffitt. The way I had been writing these releases was more like an announcement, not a story. Mentor #2 asked me why that doctor wanted me to write a release about the surgery. The answer, after like four attempts to answer, was simple.

“You want to write this story about the surgery to make people aware that Moffitt is on the cutting-edge for this procedure. People that need this procedure should want to come to Moffitt and Moffitt alone to get it, which in turn creates profit for Moffitt.”

Lesson #4: Quit blaming everyone else.

I was blaming the institution for not allowing me to write it as anything but an announcement. I was taking the fact that I didn’t know of any other way to convey the information and turning it around on them. I was blaming my teachers for not teaching us how to think this way. The fact of the matter is, he may be the only one who does. And then everyone who meets him, has anything to do with him, is made into a believer.

“Quit blaming them Sydney, and write it how you know it should be written,” he said.

Turns out, I haven’t been giving myself the experience I should. I’ve been going with the flow, not looking for avenues to break out. I didn’t know I could. And I don’t know that I can. But think about it. What if everything I’ve written this semester was re-drafted to give it purpose and to make it matter, not just to announce to whoever is listening that this has happened. What if I re-wrote it to make people want to listen, to make them want more, to make them believe in what we’re doing.

“That’s the kind of stories I’d like to tell, Sydney. That’s compelling stuff. I get clients that hand me a spoon and want me to make the spoon matter. You’re handed content that does matter, that is important. Think of what you can do with that.”

Lesson #5: My resume is a work in progress, as each mentor has different advice.

We worked on my resume, which is like what every mentor wants to do with me right now. I love how different people from different backgrounds have me writing it differently. This guy has been the president of three different agencies, he knows what’s up. He doesn’t do the hiring, and the guy has never written a resume for himself in his life, but he’s seen tens of thousands of resumes, so he knows what the people that do the hiring are looking for.

So what’s next? I draft my resume per his suggestions and get some more feedback. I have lunch with Penelope today, so that will probably get my mind spinning in the opposite direction.

A classmate of mine, Sophia, approached me the other day about getting back into blogging. She, much like a lot of our generation, had a Xanga. Long before the days of Facebook and MySpace, that was our way of communicating, mainly gossip, but communicating nonetheless.

Sophia has a ton of questions, and in the middle of responding via email, I got so inspired and was really on a roll, so I thought I’d address the questions here. Penelope said it in October, and I stand true to this today: blogging is single-handedly the most important thing we can do for where we are at in our careers right now. Allow me to tell you why.

1. Your blog gives your resume a voice. Right underneath your name and address, put the URL for your blog. Your writing gives your resume a personality. It lets people who want to know more, get to hear the real you, get to know your most intimate thoughts. You look great on paper, sure, but what you post about will build your street-cred and your online presence.

2. Posting about experiences gives you more for your resume. As I’ve learned from my mentor, your resume is about the experiences you’ve had, not whether or not you were paid for them. That being said, if there is a position you want, but you don’t have the experience, create it.

3. Get a mentor. I joined Brazen Careerist, a blog network (brazencareerist.com) after I met Penelope at the National Conference for PRSSA. She stole my heart at a panel about getting a mentor so I figured who better to mentor me than the lady talking about mentors. She is the reason I’m blogging, and if you check out her blog, you’ll see why. She’s everything I want to be in my career. And your mentors can be anyone, a classmate, a professor, a complete stranger that you admire, anyone. But finding a good mentor is the challenging part.

4. Join a blog network. I’m a featured community blogger at Brazen Careerist (on the front page today, thank you Ryan) and it’s been very rewarding so far. I’m going to SXSW for the interactive conference and Ryan is staying with my roommate and I. All of my favorite bloggers (a lot of whom I’ve discovered through Brazen) will be at SXSW, as well as some of the influential people in PR that I have plans to meet while I’m in Austin.

5. Get active on Twitter. You asked why. I have three interviews lined up this weekend (so far) because of Twitter. It’s all about conversation. I’ll post links to my new blog posts, and I’ll post links to other blog posts or articles that I enjoy. Getting exposure to your writing is key, but seeing what other people are contributing is important as well.

6. Build your personal brand. I have a couple posts about this on my site, but the man you want to go to about anything personal branding is Dan Schawbel. Follow him on Twitter, read his articles, you’ll get a better idea of what exactly personal branding is. In essence – you are your brand. Sydney Owen is my brand, it’s what I’m selling. And I spend a good majority of my time interacting with people that need Sydney Owen for their company to succeed… See where I’m going?

7. Check out who’s following who. The great thing is, people who blog and people who are active on Twitter are a population all their own.

What is the main reason you blog? Is it to enhance your career? Supplement your education? As a senior in college, how important is it to be blogging? If you could give one suggestion to someone (almost) brand new to the blog0sphere, what would it be?

I have been working extremely hard on Sydney 2.0. It is my personal brand and everything that goes with it – this blog, my résumé, and networking my face off. So you can imagine how frustrating it is for me when I run into someone who doesn’t understand my views on PR, who doesn’t understand that Twitter is what you make of it, who doesn’t understand how the focus of everything media is shifting towards the internet.

Not understanding and not wanting to understand are two totally different things. I guess I should clarify – I get frustrated by the people that don’t want to understand. People that just don’t get it are my prime audience – I can educate them about why what I do is so vital to being successful in not only your personal career, but also as a company.

Three years ago, I never would have thought that being a big deal online could make you a big deal in real life. Sure, a lot of the people on Twitter, (okay, almost all) fit into that “early adopter” category I learned about in school.  We’re the first ones on the scene with new technology, new concepts, new beliefs. The rest of the categories are increasingly insignificant – eventually dwindling down to the people that never “adopt” because they’re too afraid of the change or they’re always waiting for the next big thing, instead of trying to be the next big thing.

And that’s where I am right now.

For the past four months, I have been consumed by creating my résumé with Penelope. Six (maybe seven?) drafts later, she gave me the thumbs up – saying it was ready for me to send out to potential employers. She also suggested that I create a job description for my dream job. So I did.

With Nick’s help, we edited a handful of ideal jobs that I found online. I was so excited to have this document in my hands, it is something that could land me the job of my dreams. As I read it to my dad, he was really impressed and liked the approach that I was taking on this job hunt for after I graduate (my dad is very forward-thinking and one hell of a writer, by the way).

I sent it out to two people, my mom and one of her coworkers who is a mentor of mine. The response I got back was less than ideal. Prior to this, the people exposed to my strategy (I can count them on two fingers) were ecstatic about what I had produced. Then I got this little gem;

“It’s great for a position proposal, but not really a résumé.”

I freaked out, thinking that I forgot to send the résumé with it. Confirmed: the résumé was the second page of the document.

Is this my first little slice of self-doubt? Possibly. Okay, I definitely came close to tears. I value her opinion a lot, so hearing that rocked my world for a second. But will I let this bring me down? Of course I won’t. I’ve worked way too hard to get to where I am right now, and I’m not stopping. (And though I wouldn’t classify her as a hater, this article is great)

My gut tells me that not everyone will love my work, be it my résumé, my blog, materials I produce, what have you. That’s a given. Much like guys I date don’t like it when I blog about them (I can’t imagine why). You can’t please everyone. So, that being said, I welcome the criticisms. Hearing multiple opinions on my work is only going to make it better.

Maybe I’ll have multiple versions of my résumé – ones for people that don’t want something new and innovative, and ones for people that do. More specifically, ones that don’t have a whole bunch of statistics proving how productive I am in every position that I hold, but rather boring descriptions of what I was supposed to be doing at the time. I guess I’ll have to tailor it to my audience.

What do you do when you’re faced with news, much like this, that totally rocks your world? How do you deal with the brief flash of self-doubt? When you are so sure of something, so confident in your work, how do you react to someone thinking that it’s just not as great as you think?