Nice to see you again. Follow me, @SydneyOwen. Thanks for being here!
Okay, so here it is. My “I’m-so-excited-and-this-is-why” post. The post of all posts. The post that is supposed to brag about everything I’ve achieved through the diligent use of mentors, social media, and my education. Except, the story has changed. And I already did a lot of bragging here, and here.
Yes, I’m still excited to move to Chicago. Yes, I’m thrilled that connections I made in Austin at SXSW are what got my foot in the door with one of the largest global PR firms. But the new and shiny has wore off the initial news.
Now reality sets in. I need to save $____ to _____ my stuff and put it in my _____ in _______. So many blanks to fill in, I feel like one giant mad-lib. Insert amount of money to be saved here. Insert move or store my stuff there. I’m moving to this neighborhood and it will cost this much. It’s numbing my mind.
I search almost obsessively for apartments in Chicago. I ponder daily whether I should just move all of my stuff and go for it, sign a year lease and take that leap, or if I should keep it down here until I know what’s going on with me after this internship program.
I want to move my stuff up there. I think it’s symbolic of me doing this, pursuing my career without looking back. I want to move my stuff up there because I want to believe that I’m good enough to get hired full-time somewhere up there. I want to believe that everything I’m doing is enough to have these people beating down my door to have me come work with them.
I’m planning for all angles here, so let me know if I miss anything.
Perfect Scenario:
I move to Chicago with all of my furniture and find a fabulous apartment in a great neighborhood and I magically sell my car that I’m upside down in. I work like a madman, taking in as much as humanly possible, learning everything from everyone, and after the eight weeks that are required before you’re eligible for a full-time position, one is created by the PR Gods above and I’m working with people that are brilliant in a department that utilizes my talents. I make enough money to keep the apartment I picked out, and I don’t have to use my credit cards that I just paid off. I know that I’ll be in this position for awhile, so I go ahead and take all of the necessary steps to become a citizen of the state of Illinois. Oh, and my blood isn’t too thin from living in Florida sunshine for four years.
Almost Perfect Scenario:
I move to Chicago like mentioned above, but maybe my perfect apartment isn’t available anymore, so I find something almost as fabulous (no biggie). I still work like crazy, but maybe the PR Gods want me to experience the whole 16-weeks of intern-dom and theeeen there’s a position open for me to pursue. I do, and I get that dream position and I start my career with a bang. It’s a little chilly, but I’ll get a jacket and be fine. (My dad would tell me to suck it up.)
Probable Scenario:
I move to Chicago with everything I can fit in my car, but leave my stuff at home for the time being. I have a colleague who said I can store my stuff at her house, so I do that, at least until I know what is going on with my life after the program. Sixteen weeks fly by, and I’m gaining a ton of knowledge and offering some of my insights as well. After the 16 weeks, I’m offered a full-time position which I graciously accept. I ship my stuff up to myself, figure out what will fit in my apartment and go from there. Watch out windy city – I’m ready!
Borderline Nightmare (but okay in the end) Scenario:
I get an apartment that’s alright. I can live with alright. The internship goes well, but due to the “economic stress” (which I think is total, complete BS by the way), there are no positions available at this firm. Another agency has another intern program I can go through while I figure it out. Or maybe the internship goes as well as it does in the other scenarios but maybe the weather really kills me.
Nightmare situation:
My mediocre apartment is great for a week, until I realize there is a serious ____ infestation. And I can’t get a hold of my landlord. And the hot water goes out. And I still can’t get a hold of the landlord. So now I’m infested and freezing in the shower. The internship is awesome, but I learn that I hate agency PR, the whole reason I moved to Chicago. There aren’t any jobs – like, I can’t even wait tables while I wait for an opportunity in PR. Then I get evicted, not because I can’t pay, but because my building is being rezoned into a playground. Or a jail. And then a meteor strikes the Lake and there is a great flood and it doesn’t matter because I’m drowning.
::wake up::
I know I’ll be fine. I do. I always figure it out. Always. But what if this time is the time that I can’t handle it? What if this is the time that pulls me under and I can’t get out?
I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that the semester is winding down and now I have half of the things to worry about that I did during the semester. Perhaps now I have more time to over-analyze.
If this doesn’t work out, it’s not the end of the world right? I mean, I’m not a failure if I go up there and it doesn’t work out. I can come home, apply for jobs down here and make a living for myself here in Florida.
I have an outstanding network of people that I could contact if Chicago doesn’t happen. I just really want to believe that this is the direction I’m supposed to go.
So, do I go for it, and if it doesn’t work out, come back to plan B? Or do I play it safe, keep a backup plan in clear sight and hope that I don’t have to use it? I don’t want it to seem so cut and dry, but in my mind it is.
Have you ever moved for your career, but not known what would happen after ____ days? Have you moved for an internship and prayed for the best or did you play it safe?