This is how I’ve been answering the “how is your business going?” question for the last couple of weeks.
“It’s so fun!”
I’ve answered that question like this before, and I totally mean it. It’s usually followed by gushing about all the rad shit in the works, and just oozing excitement.
But in the last two weeks, to my over-achieving mind, saying “it’s so fun” (and stopping there) is way better than saying:
“Well, to be honest, I’m concerned about the registration for the next event and I’m actually scared shitless of what might happen after May, and I’m really excited about the opportunities/ideas I have but I’m worried that it will all come crashing down because so far, it seems too good to be true.”
That’s my truth right now.
I know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I know that starting a business takes time. I know this can be a roller coaster ride. I know that this is totally in line with who I am, what my strengths are, and what I want to see for the sport. I know all of that.
But I still hold myself back. I do. As far as event coordinating/marketing jobs in the skydiving industry go, the job I had was pretty close to the top if you put all of the dream gigs on the list. Super rad drop zone, skydiving (and as such, working) year-round, awesome events already in place, a KILLER team of badass people to work with, opportunity to breathe life into what was existing and maybe build some new stuff – it’s all good. And it was a BLAST. I am NOT my last job. I am NOT any of the people who have held the job before me or have held similar jobs elsewhere.
I am Sydney Williams. I am building Planet Green Socks.
Lately, when I say “it’s so fun” – in my mind, I’m eliminating the opportunity to get into details, because surely everyone who asks is asking so they can compare my success/struggles with PGS to my success/struggles at Elsinore. Except, here’s the thing. They aren’t. I AM. I am probably the only person on the planet who is comparing Current Sydney to Past Sydney and it’s a really big barrier to how I talk to myself.
So, I’m calling myself out. I’m going to be more authentic in the way I answer the question because the handful of people who ask are people who legit give a shit about what I’m doing and how I’m enjoying (or not) the process. The people who are asking are people who have their own business and want to see me succeed, and/or people who know that this is something with legs.
It’s easy to get caught up in what my big fat dreams are for PGS and completely ignore all of the awesome stuff that has happened so far. I’ve had the opportunity to share Adam’s story with a lot of people. We’ve raised more than $2500 for the Adam Rubin Memorial Fund. We’ve sold out two events, and have a third and fourth booked. I have coaches who are mind-blowingly amazing in their skills as coaches, their commitment to the dream, and their wisdom as we build this thing. There are two other event tours I’m trying to get my brain behind and rope in some badass people to build them with. This weekend, I get to see a bunch of awesome people make amazing memories at the Angle Camp with Amy and Domi.
All of that said, it is important to remember WHY it’s fun. On Monday, I went down to San Diego and watched Kat do food prep all day and try all of the yummy (and healthy, yay!) things she was making. And we got to share about the ups and downs and all of the self-discovery that comes with leaving the dream gigs behind and starting our own version of our dream gigs. And that was FUN. Having the time and the opportunity to have those kinds of experiences is just one of the bazillion reasons why I’m doing this.
I know I’m not the only one who’s moved on from one great job to a new opportunity. And I know I’m not the only one who has, at some point in their career, come into a position with “big shoes to fill” or huge expectations of who I should be in that role. This situation is not unique to me. So it’s high time I stopped telling myself I’m alone in this. Because I’m not. I’d be willing to bet if you’re reading this, you’ve felt that way at one point or another. The self-doubt. The comparison of Current self to your Past self, or even to others who are kicking ass and taking names around you.
I’m going to knock that comparison shit off. Straight up, I’m digging in to getting grounded in who I am, what I’m doing, and where I’m going. Let’s get all kinds of authentic and real up in here. It’s time to own our stories, and give comparisons a big fat middle finger. Care to join me?